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Sunday, 13 February 2011

day 5

When we woke up in the morning I don't think Glenn or Ladie were prepared for the scale of the rally. 4500+ pretty much constantly pissed bikers camping in the snow setting off fireworks, riding while drunk and some Czech guys were even firing pistol signal flares at each other!!

Not my first choice of motorbike to ride in the snow and ice. But it looks quicker than the 90's haha

A little 20cc pedal and pop popped over from Czech.

While walking around the site we got talking to some Germans on 600's and when the saw the 90's they (like most other people who saw the bikes) started filling us up with beer to congratulate us having " big balls" as they put it. Everytime we passed they called us over for more beer and we taught each other swear words in eachother's languages haha. Vixers all the way haha

An elephant for the Elefantentreffen

This tyre was being sold by Antony (the guy who gave me a lift in his van last year with the 90) it costs €1800 and when used on ice can turn tighter than any bike on tarmac!!

Then we discovered the pub

and then some more litres of beer

and then the coolest hat I've seen in ages.

And then what happened was a series of some of the funniest and stupidest things I've done in ages. The 6 pints in the pub and the other god knows how many pints we had earlier are crutial to why it happened.

We left the pub and had to push the bike up the road until we got to the rally approach road where anything goes, you can ride backwards while drunk and on fire if you want haha. Well I decided that pushing was for loosers and that I reckoned there was a short cut across the snow covered field to the rally. I tried a run up, got a tiny bit air-born as I left the road and things seemed to go alright riding through 8 inches of virgin snow. So I did what any sensible drunk person would do: go back and get my two mates and give it a go three's up. So we positioned ourselves with a rather large run-up and started gathering speed. The air-born part worked but the landing was unexpected: the weight of three blokes full of beer on one little bike had affected the handling somewhat and after hell-of-a wobble on for 10 metres we all hit the deck like a sack of spuds. We were all laughing so hard I thought I was going to wet myself, me and Glenn were trapped under the bike, Ladie got thrown clear but all of a sudden I heard the words "STOP POLIZEI" and saw the German policman running towards us. Time to run me thinks. Glenn was still laughing so much he wasn't going to be much help so Laddie had to lift the bike off me. I then fired up the bike and with a push from the guys we sped across the field (upright this time) until we got to the road (yes my drunk idea short-cut worked, no idea how haha) where we all went three's up again and down to the safety of hiding amongst 4500 other bikers.

When we got to the rally I noticed someone had taken a section of fence away that was right next to our tent so I sensed another drunken short-cut was there so I took it. There was a little kicker ramp as we left the road but that was fine, it was then that I realised that in about 15 metres time there was Fritz, Udo and Plong sat around the fire having a nice calm drink with three bumbling drunken retards crammed on a C90 heading staright towards them downhill on ice/snow at a rather alarming rate. This was not going to end well, I managed to steer round our tent and guy ropes (just) but this was only a temporary solution as that had now lined us up perfectly with the centre of their fire. I couldnt use the rear brake as my feet were the only thing holding us upright so my only option was to grab a hand full of front break on ice (why did that have to be my only option haha). Their nice relaxed drink was thus disturbed by about 5 seconds of three guys shouting"ARRRGGGGHHHHH" before low siding the bike and what looked like Dumb, Dumber and Officer Doofy re-enacting a Mission Impossible style bike slide before stopping just in front of the fire with everybody in hysterics.

We then settled down for a couple of quiet drinks around diffrent people's fires. Once again free drinks were always being given to us for riding the 90's from England ans after a couple we went back to see Fritz, Udo and Plong. But the 90 was calling, no matter how many times I crashed her she would keep calling me; to try and take her places that no other bikes would go. Eventually I gave in and went for a victory lap of the event. This time I chose Glenn's ass as the ballast the give traction on the ice and we went exploring.

I found the ridiculously steep downhill footpath that people couldn't walk up earlier on and decided to give it a go. Glenn was on the back repeatedly saying "uh-oh" "woah woah" but after a little wobble we were down safe and sound. Then we tried the ice hill climb:

This was the hill climb during the day and this is a bike and sidecar attempting it and actually making it (a lot couldn't)

Me and Glenn did it two's up and manged it quite well with a couple of cheers from people and we went back to collect Ladie and try it three's up, oh dear.

We picked up ladie and did the same downhill footpath again but this time with Ladie going "uh-oh" "are we gonna make that" Glenn had now realised the true capability of the 90 haha. Then we got to the ice climb and hit it three's up with about 75% beans but all quite far back on the seat. As we started to climb I realised the front wheel wasn't actually touching the ground very often because of the weight on the back. As the hill got steeper the front wheel wasn't touching the ground at all and as we started to slow but still keeping full throttle I can remember seeing ground, ground, sky, uh-oh more sky, i'm upside down now, uh-oh the ground again. We had managed to backflip the 90 and were now all trapped underneath it with quite a large amount of people laughing at what just happened. A friendly German walked over and picked the bike off of us and we did what any sensible person would do: turn round and go to the bottom of the hill to safety, and take a much longer and faster run up :) this time we all slid as far forward on the bike to help the front wheel stay down, composed ourselves and shouted in true Jeremy Clarkson style "POWER" and made our ascent on maximum beans. Quite a crowd had gathered now after seeing the first attempt and as we went round the ice bend sideways with the front wheel in the air for most of there was some "oh, oh, ooo" as we made it round and as we finally plodded up to the top there was a round of cheers and clapping as the poor little 90 that was a 1000 miles from home made it three's up on road tyres where other much bigger and faster bikes couldn't :)

After all that drunken motorcycle riding (my mates must trust me quite a bit) we retired to our tent, and in the morning woke up to having ice formed on our hats and me having a rather large bruise from one of the woopsies haha:

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